Lucky Number Seven (plus one)

8 am.  20 degrees Fahrenheit.  Heading out the door for a run?

Yes, it is true.  I am in the land of the cold, home of the frigid (Utah).  I went out for a run again this morning and realized that I really like to run in the cold!  For some reason, I feel like I can run forever when I can't feel my leg muscles.  Hmmmm...

The time out did allow for some random thoughts to enter my brain, which is helpful for another randomness theme for my post today.  I wasn't officially tagged, but I am participating in the "7 Things About Me" meme anyway.  So, FYI:

1.  I think the lint from the dryer is cool.  I like to pick it out of the receptacle.  I found myself doing that at my in-laws' house this morning while changing over the laundry in a sort of OCD-kind of way.

2.  I like to fill out forms.  Doctor offices, job applications, school applications, health forms, you name it.  I often fill forms out for Dave just because I like to do it.

3.  I have hair envy.  My hair is thin and scraggly and no matter how much I want it to grow out and be full and shiny and pretty, it never will be that way.  So I envy others' hair.  Sometimes, I ask to touch their hair.  If they let me, (without getting that funny look on their face that says I am strange) it makes me happy.  If I can brush and braid it, even better.

4.  I can't see properly with my left eye.  This is somewhat inconvenient, since I am left-handed. Thus, I have learned to wield sports equipment from several sports (tennis, fencing, water polo, etc.) with my right hand.   Try it sometime.

5.  On the left eye thing, it isn't as if I can't see anything with it.  It is just that it can't really understand what is going on.  For instance, if I know you, and you walk in the room while I am looking with only my left eye, I would not recognize you by sight alone.  I would be able to see you clearly, but the connection that allows me to say, "oh, that is so-and-so" is, well, not connected.  It is weird how one eye knows the colour green, but the other cannot remember that name.

6.  I do not get grossed out by blood or needles.  I like to watch when I get blood taken to see the technique of the phlebotomist.  When I see blood, I think that there has got to be something to fix, but I don't always know how, so we go to the ER.  

7.  I would love to get my master's degree in anatomy.  I totally geek out when people start talking body parts.

Now you know.  Will life ever be the same?

ps.  I guess it will be eight today:  I was in a hula festival.  See if you can tell which one is me.

A-Randoming We Will Go

Today, my lovely sister tagged me for this "10 Random Things About Me" meme and I have been thinking about it ever since.  So, in no particular order (duh, RANDOM) here we go:

1.  When I am old(er), I want to teach at a university and have grey hair and ride my motorcycle to classes and have a great time molding young minds and grading lame papers.

2.  I hate cookie dough.  I taste it when I bake to check for salt, but it gives me the heebs.

3.  I am afraid of old carpet.  When I move into a place, I have to change the carpet or I can't sit on it.  

4.  Dolphins fascinate me.  I know it sounds cliche, but I love, love them and I want to be one.  I swam out to be near them at Waimea recently and I could hear them calling to each other under the water.  It was incredible.

5.  I have always wanted to be a folk singer.  I can only sing in a very limited range and I don't know how to play the guitar, but I know I could do it if I had the chance.   

6.  I want to be on Survivor.  I have a great idea for an audition tape...

7.  I never get blisters when I run.  Even during my longest runs.  I know that sounds like bragging, but it truly does surprise me from time to time, like during last week's marathon, where I ran in wet shoes and socks for the first 18 miles (after that, just my socks were wet. No blisters).

8.  I don't eat pork.  Ever.

9.  I am slightly obsessed with cultural dancing and music.  I love to lose myself in other cultures--it makes me feel grounded somehow.

10.  I have a grey eyebrow.  It is over my left eye and not very obvious.  But I found it.  And now it must die. 

There.  I don't know ten people to tag, but everyone should do this!  It is fun!  And, what is more fun than FUN?!!?

So have a great day and celebrate your randomness.  Your 'you'-ness.  You ROCK!   

ps.  the guy in this picture really did run the marathon wearing just this red thing.  I passed him on several occasions and every time, I have to admit, I did a double-take.  Why?  I ask you, why?  I just don't get it...

Mindful Marathoning

This morning I was amazed by the glorious sunrise that I watched from my deck.  I was also amazed at the fact that my legs were working. Let me tell you why.

Yesterday, I ran a marathon.

Big deal, right?  I've run them before, you may say.  But this time, it was different.  It was the first time that I did not, at some point, swear that I would never, ever run one again.  

I ran with my BGFF Karen (pictured here, with me, at my graduation last June) to support her during her second marathon.  She had signed up almost a year ago with the hopes to achieve a certain time goal.  Due to a late start in the training schedule and numerous time constraints (she teaches high school, is the assistant cross-country coach and has 5 church callings and a husband), she came up against the marathon with a shortage of long runs.

  

Normally, during the course of training for a marathon, long runs reach distances of 20+ miles. Over several months, a runner 'builds up' to at least one 20-miler and completes it no later than 3 weeks before the scheduled marathon.   Well, our long runs reached a 14-miler, which is perfect. If you are running a half-marathon.  To say the least, Karen felt unprepared.  And alone:  her husband Phil, who had signed up with her, did not train at all.  Yet, she was determined to run anyway. 

I was not training for the marathon.  I had no intention of running it this year, especially after running it last year and it being a dismal affair.  The Honolulu Marathon is hot, crowded, and they give you an apple to eat when it is over.  An. Apple.  After burning about 3,000 calories and sweating for hours, they have an apple for the runners.  There was no way I was running it again.  Until I saw Karen's sad and lonely face.  That is when I decided I would go the distance, so to speak, with her.  It wasn't that she couldn't do it without me--her mental toughness is far superior to mine--but I knew we could do better together.

And, it was AMAZING.  We knew that we had not trained enough.  But, we had trained together, so we came up with a plan.  After being warned several times by my husband that I was going to be sore and unhappy, we showed up at the start line at 4:30am, in the dark and in the rain, along with the throngs of the Japanese that fly in specifically for this race.  Our stomachs were nervous, our digestive tracts were on double-time, but as we watched the fireworks go off at the 5am start, we got excited!  We knew what we were in for, but we did it anyway.  We went, we ran, we conquered.  We had our ups and our downs, we got really tired and ate energy gels when we thought we might throw them up, we walked a bit and we laughed a lot.  And we took over 30 minutes off of Karen's time for last year's marathon.

Here is why I think we did so well, not having completed proper training:  we had great attitudes and presence of mind.  We had no expectations except to finish sometime before they took the finish line down.  We stayed in the moment of the race.  We allowed our aches and tiredness to come along for the ride, but did not allow them to dictate our run.  We got really wet and super sweaty, but it really does come down to taking care of yourself mentally. Staying in the moment.  Going with the flow.  Oh, and we changed our wet, sloshy shoes for nice dry ones at mile 18 (thanks, Phil!!).

  

Yes, my legs are indeed sore today, a marathon hangover of sorts.  They worked well enough for a restorative walk down the beach with that amazing sunrise at my back.  I will run a marathon again, and with proper training, too.  And hopefully, with Karen as well.  Yesterday really taught me about the benefits of totally staying in the moment of an experience and how doing things unselfishly can allow us to reap incredible rewards (well, I wasn't completely unselfish--I really wanted that finisher's t-shirt!!).   Plus, it is just plain good to have a genuine friend at your side.   Thanks, Karen!  And thank you, Dave and Phil, for being great sports!

To Infinity and Beyond!

Ours.
  Our sealing at the Mt. Timpanogos Temple
 The boys at the tree--Christmas 1999. 

Ok, I know there are lots of people out there in lala-land that have been married for lots of years. But last weekend, I felt a particular sense of accomplishment as my husband Dave and I celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary. Over a decade, less than a quarter of a century. I'll take it.

When Dave and I got married, we had known each other a total of five weeks. Yes, you read that right, 5. Weeks. If a child of mine did that, I might have serious problems with that child's reasoning capabilities. But it has been the best snap decision of my life. My husband and I laugh a LOT, and loudly, and sometimes at each other (in a good way)--he is my BFF and weekly date and my sparring partner, all rolled into one.

My life has its stresses, true. Blending a family is not easy. Being a stepmother is sometimes an arduous and thankless task. And rewarding. And fulfilling. Like being a mother, only more complicated and sometimes, quite interesting. And I wouldn't trade it for anything.

So here's to you, my family of his, hers and ours: I love you all and what an over-the-hills-and-through-the-woods kind of a trip it has been! Who knows, soon, my house may be a grandmother's house! I have gained a daughter-in-law this year. (Daughters-in-law sometimes mean grandchildren. Hmmmm...am I ready for that?!?!??!!!!)

It is all good, as they say out here in the Islands. And I look forward to the next phase, even as I enjoy this one. Rock on, dude!

Let down your emotional hair!

Oh my! Has it really been three weeks since I've posted? Well, I did move after all. I guess that is a good reason, if there is one. It is a good thing I did not commit to NaMoBloMo, or whatever it is, like my lovely sister did, because I would have failed miserably!

On to other things: I was vinyasa-ing* through one of my Baron Baptiste DVDs this morning and as I was in this twisted-triangle-y thing, I realised that I was struggling through the pose. I was starting to panic--I have really tight hips and hamstrings, partly due to my running. And then I heard Baron say, in his smooth voice: "Let down your emotional hair." Oh YEAH! I was uptight! I was feeling cranky about my hips! I was holding it IN!

Several yoga instructors I have had have told us students how much emotion we, especially women, hold in our hips. By holding poses that bring us close to the edge of our tolerance, yet breathing through them, we actually can let go of a lot of tension and anxiety. Believe me, it works. I remember being at a yoga workshop (led by Baron himself--remember, Jenna?) and being in a really difficult (for me) hip opener. As I struggled, Baron walked over, placed his hand on my sacrum and said, "Just let it go." I totally did! And, alarmingly, I started to cry! But I left that day with more a more open, relaxed body and mind. It worked today as well--I feel HAPPY!

I did not intend to extoll the virtues of yoga in this post, but as usual, I get going and woah! a tangent!
But a daily yoga practice is one huge way, for me, to let down my emotional hair. Recognize it, let it go and, along with some deep breathing, move on...

Sometimes, when I walk out of a movie where the heroine was particularly spunky or emotionally carefree, I find myself wanting to be more like that. I try to smile more often and let the little things just roll off my back. We all have our stresses, true, but do they have to RULE our lives? Must we stuff stress and emotions down into our hips and back? No, I say--it is not necessary! Let us practice just letting it out, and letting it go--whatever "it" is. Workers, unite!** Take a deep ujjayi breath and LET IT GO!!!!!

Have a Happy Thanksgiving! And, if your food for some reason does not turn out, it is OK! If you eat too much, it is FINE! If you sleep through dinner, OH WELL! If your children fight, send them OUTSIDE! It will be an incredible day! Seriously, what other day can you eat pie with such abandon?

*vinyasa, as you probably know, is movement with breath, i.e., breathe in, bring your arms up over your head. Breathe out, and lower them back to your sides...
**No, I am not a Marxist.

I Made 37!

Here in the Islands, when your birthday passes, you do not 'turn' to your next year, you achieve another year, as in, "My son just made 13" or "Your dad made 86?" Thus, upon my birthday, I made 37--just a few days ago, in fact.
In my mind, it is not the number that surprises me, it is the sheer number of events that have occured in these thirty-seven years. And, how fast the years have gone by! It makes sense that when you are young, the years seems to go by more slowly. Each year of, say, a nine-year-old's life is a larger proportion of their life compared to mine. To me, the time just seems to flip by, like when you thumb the edges of the pages of a book. My husband Dave and I realized that when twelve more years have passed (this is the number of years we have been married thus far), my youngest child will be graduated from high school!

So, I have decided that I need to make a list, of sorts, of things that I want to do before the next 12 years go by:
* see all of my children through their educations
* finish the sewing AND knitting projects in my sewing bin (before adding new ones--key!)
* pursue graduate studies
* make that trip to India
* become a grandmother (the odds are definitely in my favour...)
* complete an Ironman triathlon
* complete a yoga teacher training course
* own and operate a farm (what kind of farm? you may ask...I don't know that part yet! Just get me those barnyard animals!)
* spend a summer learning Spanish in an immersion school with my family

So far, so good...I may add to the list as I see fit. But they say the first step to recovery is stating the issues at hand, right? My goal is to capture these years and make them COUNT! Plus, it'll be fun! (I hope my husband and children agree!!)

PS. When I "make" 40, I plan to run forty miles! Want to come with?

Keine Ahnung

This is what I thought during much of my GRE-taking session that occured last Saturday. It means "no idea" as in " I have NO IDEA" (Ich habe nicht keine Ahnung)...but I love school. And I want more.
Why is it that standardized tests accompany and terrorize us throughout our educational career? There are assessments for kindergarten, both at the beginning and the end of the school year. Grades 1, 4, 6, 8 AND 10 include at least a week of the dreaded testing for the children, at least in my state. Not to mention the weeks of preparation that the students endure to get to those hours of testing that requires filling in hundreds of little bubbles. And then, the pre-SAT, the ACT, the actual SAT, the AP tests, the graduation exit for seniors--is there no relief???
Apparently not. The final for General Chemistry is a standardized test. A timed standardized test. SO unfair! I can do chemistry, ok? At least, gen chem. But timed? WIth my final grade as ransom? That is just stress. Another one waits, this time at the end of the organic chemistry series. I guess the American Chemical Society can just DO that.
Then, graduate school. The GRE is only the general test; there is a GRE Subject test as well. Or, if you prefer to be a lawyer, you get the LSAT; a doctor, the MCAT or the DAT. If English is your second language or if you wish to teach English as a second language, there are tests for that as well.
I know, I know, there are standards we all must achieve before we can move on. Yes, I realize that standardized tests are a convenient way to find the level of education to which a person has progressed. But what about those of us who know the material, yet the set-up and structure of the test points directly to our weaknesses? Could there be another way to prove to our prospective educators or employers that we are capable of the tasks and rigours required without having to know how to figure the area of a trapezoid? (it is A=1/2(b1+b2)(h), BTW)
Believe me, I studied. For weeks, and using the practice materials the testing institution itself recommended and even gave out. I practiced! I learned new vocabulary, practiced figuring (by hand) standard deviation and reviewed many algebra and geometry equations and theorems. But I still did poorly.
There is hope, however. There was actual writing involved (yay!) and I did graduate magna cum laude from my undergraduate university. May the admissions committee have mercy...please LET ME IN!!!